i met somebody, flirtatious socialite

I started out writing this as, "The past two weeks felt like..." and a bunch of words popped into my head. Words like "hell," "I got sucked into a gauntlet," "I was kicked to the ground and then was kicked some more (by someone wearing steel-toed shoes)," and "I was toyed with physically and emotionally. Repeatedly." All of these statements are not gross exaggerations and are completely factual. However, I think what feeling expresses the post-exams feeling best is that it was a little bit life-changing. In a perspective-shifting way. The other thought that comes to mind is "I have re-emerged!" But then I realize I should probably stop being so annoying.

The thing is, I realized that I could do it. Taking six exams in genetics, neuroanatomy, neurophysiology, and gross anatomy has a way of breaking people down. I think I best understood that I was on the verge of having an emotional breakdown when I was in the midst of telling my brother that the reason I treat him like crap was because I was trying to help him be a better person. I laugh at it now, but that was pretty much as low as it got. And then I studied. And succeeded.

Last night, I had a horrifying nightmare about trying to drive to a coffeeshop to study with my friend Ashley in a car that had brakes that didn't quite work. But if you pressed them really hard, and ridiculously early, like 50 yards before the stop sign, you would probably stop on time. So the effects of extreme testing are lasting and we do not escape completely unscathed. But many things helped get me through these few weeks.

Not low on the list would be coffee. About two or three years ago, I decided to go discover independent Chicago coffeeshops. I had nothing against Starbucks (at the time), but I had this idea that it would be fun to see what else was out there. What ensued pretty much opened my view of what Chicago had to offer. Before that, I thought there were a lot of places downtown, but I started taking buses and trains and had people drive with me when necessary. This process resulted in what I consider to be a very comprehensive outlook on what was going on in the coffee world. But at the same time, it also helped me discover the city that had always seemed big, almost too big.

Particularly, I got to explore the neighborhoods that I ventured into. I definitely have had a lot of adventures and formed many opinions along the way about where the nice baristas work, what spaces are conducive to studying and which to socializing. The best is running into a barista from one shop who is relaxing at another shop who tells me that the only reason that it's okay I'm there is because the other shop is closed. The thought of missing out on all the characters, ideas, and conversations I've come across is staggering. I'm possibly just waxing nostalgic because before today, I hadn't had coffee in 3 whole days.

I haven't been able to find a good resource for all the coffeeshops I've visited in Chicago. Most of them seem to have big gaping holes in them or perhaps I just haven't come across any, but I thought it'd be nice to have a good compilation of places and also to help me remember some things I've done. And I seriously need to make use of my obsessive Yelp-ing. That's my number one answer when people ask me how I found such random places. They don't seem random to me; they seem all interconnected somehow. But I know that can be hard to see. So I think I'll post my first look at tomorrow. Although it may be less useful in a practical sense to non-Chicagoans, hopefully it'll still be fun to see these interesting places.

P.S. I made some changes with the appearance of things around here. I liked the previous format because it was easy for me, but there were a lot of limitations to what I had control over in terms of how everything looked and it was starting to bother me. The picture I used in the banner is one that I took at Next Door Cafe. I thought this particular barista had brilliant designs in the lattes he made.

P.P.S. Phew, that was a lot of words.